I haven’t shared this story with very many, mainly because I was probably still trying to process everything myself!
So let’s start in November 2013. I was completing my internship so that I could graduate the following month. Preparing for graduation can be a bit stressful. Making sure you turn in all your last assignments, final exams, graduation pictures and announcements, hair and nails, and of course what to wear. I remember going to the Dillards outlet (it’s probably one of my favorite stores) and trying on dresses with my mom. My mom kept weirdly looking at my belly, but I honestly wasn’t thinking anything of it. My “pudge” was poking a little, but maybe it was the shape in which is was formed, but whatever it was she knew something didn’t seem right. It’s now December and I officially graduate with my Bachelor of Science degree from Stephen F. Austin State University. Axe Em’ Jacks!
After graduation, I moved back home with my parents because I mean what money do I have right? My mom encouraged me to go visit a doctor. I felt FINE! I was actually intensely working out with my brother and fiancé at the time. I mean I was running miles, bleachers, doing ab workouts, and even started to eat healthier! Next thing I know, my mom literally called and told me that she scheduled me a doctor’s appointment. I hate going to the doctor, but I went so she would leave me alone. I went to the doctor for a regular visit, and was asked to strip down to just the hospital gown and leave a urine sample. I’m waiting nervously and anxiously because I just wanted to get it over with! To my surprise, my doctor walked into the room, “Ms. Walker (my maiden name) you are pregnant!” I literally just looked at her puzzled. She had to be joking with me. I finally said, “What? Uhm are you sure?”
She laughed and had me go ahead and put my clothes back on so she could check everything out. When she came back in, she checked the heartbeat. Yes I heard the heartbeat! There is a baby in my tummy! While I’m already still speechless, she then tells me I was probably FIVE MONTHS! Yes, FIVE MONTHS! I didn’t know much about pregnancy, but I did know most women are pregnant for 9 months. So I’m practically halfway and I’m just now finding out?!!! I didn’t really have any symptoms so how could I be pregnant? Just WOW!
My mom already knew, she just wanted confirmation, so when I told her it was more of a I told you so. Just wait until I tell Carl! I called Carl soon as I got home. It’s funny because he was actually on his way to Dallas from Houston. I didn’t really know how to tell him, so I told him like they told me, I’m pregnant. He said the same thing I said, “What?!” I said yeah and she thinks I’m about 5 months. His voice got louder, “What five months!” He said he hung up and had to pull over to process it.
As I’m sitting home, waiting for Carl to come, a whirlwind of different emotions and thoughts hit me. I’m still young, how can I be a mother? How do I take care of a baby? Am I going to be a good mother? Where is the money going to come from? I’m not married yet, and I didn’t plan on having children until I was 30! Oh and speaking of marriage, what about the wedding that I was planning? So many questions and at the time, and no answers. Once Carl got there, we talked about some of the concerns we both had and we came to the understanding that we had to get on the grind! We were in this together and God obviously had different plans for us both.
The next month, for my doctor’s visit it was an ultrasound and OB visit. Turns out I was initially 4 months when I found out, and in that same appointment, Carl and I found out we were having a little girl! It was so bittersweet and surreal! Yes, I know. I literally found out I was pregnant a month before and the very next month I know what I’m having. Crazy right?
Life for us was changing FAST!
As the baby grew, I became more even more nervous and filled with worry because I knew something I was most afraid of was approaching. BIRTH! Stay tuned to see how that life changing experience went for us.
